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[cursedwords]

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[amethystic]

Did I ever tell you about my magic?

[cursedwords]

[ He shakes his head. She didn't tell him, and he didn't ask. Partly because it's really rude to ask people what their techniques are. They're closely guarded secrets in his world. The biggest exception being the most prominent clans, and even then most have their secrets.

Inumaki clan is not permitted secrets. Everyone knows his technique. ]

[amethystic]

I'm a walking fountain of misfortune. When I was a child, even stepping outside of my house... Cars would break and crash, trees would fall, power would short throughout the block. Worse, really. I've probably caused outbreaks of disease with my presence alone... I know there's a lot of blood on my hands passively.

I was kept in total isolation for a good chunk of my life, and even now it leaks out- its why I trip so much and drop things. ... And, if I get upset, it leaks out at times in bursts.

[cursedwords]

Sounds awful.

[ Toge offers, because he doesn't know what to say really. ]

[amethystic]

It's... better now.

But, that happened to you, earlier. Didn't it? A slip up in control.

[cursedwords]

[ Ah, is that what she wants to talk about. Toge sighs soundlessly. She probably felt it. They all did. He tilts his head a little bit, but nods. ]

Yes. I cursed everyone within earshot. It was wrong of me. I apologize.

[ He does mean that formally, because Toge twists himself into a proper seiza and bows low, wordlessly begging for forgiveness that should not come. ]

[amethystic]

That's what I thought...

( she lets him do as he must, before softly shaking her head. )

Raise your head. I can't speak for the others, but I forgive you. I understand.

[cursedwords]

[ He sighs again and sits upright again. ]

It's okay if you can't forgive me. It was dangerous.

[amethystic]

Not forgiving you isn't even crossing my mind, gotta be honest. ... And, I wasn't mad at you, earlier. I promise. I was worried.

[cursedwords]

You're too kind.

[ He expects repercussions. Punishment. There isn't any and he's a bit thrown. ]

[amethystic]

Not really. I just... I get it. When I slipped up, I was tortured. I don't want to be that sort of person. And I want to treat the people who remind me of myself better for it. I don't think punishing you will do anything... especially when you're already sorry.

I'm not going to make you talk about anything. But, how are you feeling?

[cursedwords]

[ He feels wrung out and tired, he feels horribly undervalued - and he doesn't even think he has value to begin with, but the best he can offer has been rejected. It hurts.

He shrugs. ]

[amethystic]

Things got... a little tense, yeah. Maybe I had bad timing with this.

... You know people got upset because they care about you, right?

[cursedwords]

[ That's the part that doesn't make sense. ]

I don't know about that.

It seems just as likely they're just pissed by what I did.

[amethystic]

Gnosis thinks highly of you, you know. He wants good things for you. And I think Lancelot was trying to care in his own way too. And that means sometimes it manifests in anger. Whichhh is dumb, but, people are people. They're kinda dumb too sometimes.

[cursedwords]

[ He isn't sure why Gnosis believes that he should get nice things. He's happy enough with a warm meal. ]

I'm not doubting you but I don't know why they care about me. There's no reason to.

Especially after I cursed them like that. I could hurt them. I could hurt you.

I should be better disciplined. I will get better.

[amethystic]

Because you're a person, dummy. And one Gnosis, at least, enjoys the company of. One I do too.

[cursedwords]

My classmates are the only ones that feel that way outside of here.

I'm not anything. I was born like this and everyone knows how dangerous someone like me is.

They can't wait for me to die. They will celebrate it.

[amethystic]

They're small-minded fools, then. ... I'm sorry you haven't been truly valued or cared for. And I'm sorry that it's warped things for you.

[cursedwords]

I'm used to it. It's been like this since I was born. Because I was born.

It doesn't bother me. I know where I stand. The moment I flinch, they will come for me. Execute me.

I'm only worth something if I do as I'm told. I can protect you. If I die, it doesn't matter.

[amethystic]

( that's a familiar story, and she hates it. her heart hurts just reading what's said. )

It matters to me. Thats why I want you to communicate more, so we can support each other.

[cursedwords]

I'm not supposed to talk about it.

[ He is like this by design. ]

If I die I will have been glad for what I saw of the outside world.

[amethystic]

What were we supposed to do if you got hurt in there, with no idea where you were or that you even left?

[cursedwords]

I understand that I should've left a message somewhere. I accept that.

I am used to completing all of my missions alone.

Since I started. I'm powerful. I can handle most problems. That's why I have my rank I worked hard to get it. I may seem pathetic now. But I'm not.

I want to protect you all.

[amethystic]

And we want to protect you, in turn. Not because you aren't enough, but because you are.